The Hermit's Journal 1996 Excerpts

December 31, 1995 Sunday 10:44 AM

You do it to your self when you do it to others.

January 7, 1996 Sunday 12:03 AM

Can you surrender too much to the moment?

January 15, 1996 Monday 8:38 AM

On the subject of fate or distraction, I currently feel that it is all distraction. Will cannot be self-conscious. It is what it is and doesn't know how it got there, for it exists within a world that exits beyond its self.

What is this falling through one's self into no thingness? (I sound like Sartré.)

In my room, in the studio, or grocery store, being is what it is. Your only choice is your response. To what extent do you seek to disturb things less the older you get? And is the reason because we get set in our preferences and we don't want to disturb them? More likely just fear.

My teaching and my learning are arm in arm walking through the blooming garden. I'm making better money, and traveling some.

January 17, 1996 Wednesday 8:08 PM

Dissolving in the focus of doing the effort.

January 17, 1996 Wednesday 8:54 PM

Anticipate to participate.

January 20, 1996 Saturday 2:26 PM

The point of the Method is to be able to do it on your own, to be so good at the visualization that you can call your self into the essence without external feedback

January 27, 1996 Saturday 5:49 PM

When people ask something of you they are serious.

January 28, 1996 Sunday 8:30 PM

"Play the circumstance and it will flow out of you." Martha Graham

January 29, 1996 Monday 1:38 PM

It is important that you modify the environment you are in to give you what you want. If you love to hang from a bar by your hands that lets you get a good stretch through the length of your body, set a situation up like that in your house.

February 2, 1996 Friday 7:51 PM

How curious that time goes forward in real time and backward in timed events.

February 8, 1996 Thursday 8:49 AM

What was it in me that has always made me the listener? One who feels from within?

February 11, 1996 Sunday 1:53 PM

The Method is an engagement in the abstract that you can feel. mjm

February 11, 1996 Sunday 1:57 PM

"Trust to luck." ((( )))

February 11, 1996 Sunday 2:01 PM

"...this is the way to go because it lengthens and strengthens muscles rather than building bulk." Linda Farrell, New York's Equinox gym.

February 11, 1996 Sunday 3:07 PM

You don't find a movement; the movement finds you.

February 11, 1996 Sunday 3:08 PM

private practice in movement

February 18, 1996 Sunday 12:43 PM

Your stomach is, or can be part of what you use to move. When letting it all hang loose becomes a pattern you can forget that there is even the option of staying connected in your stomach.

February 18, 1996 Sunday 12:45 PM

There is knowing the exercise. And there is knowing why you do the exercise and where it fits into the whole body.

February 20, 1996 Tuesday 9:24 PM

I offer you the ability to publish the way I do. If you can understand how I publish why would you not want to do the same? (((((I mean, really?)))))

February 20, 1996 Tuesday 9:28 PM

And who to talk to...

I forget. I forget that having no one to talk to I come here. To talk to my self only long enough to where I can begin to start hearing my self.

February 22, 1996 Thursday 8:48 AM

Don't let my limitations become your limitations.

February 22, 1996 Thursday 8:49 AM

If you are looking for a sequence to address the hamstring glutial connection try this:

Towel
Standing foot exercises
Magic circle
Shoulder bridge
Roll Down
Colitus
Leg springs, circles hips up
Rowings with arm springs

February 26, 1996 Monday 8:22 AM

What is the dominating force in our lives as physical beings?

Gravity. Fundamentally, we live in a physical world, a world of physics. Gravity, whatever it is, causes rotation.

When we condition our bodies and our minds we seek to develop more internal control of rotation. By seeking more rotational control within our body we are forced to concentrate. Concentrating is rotational control of the mind--staying focused on one subject you revolve around.

February 28, 1996 Wednesday 10:52 PM

There is no dialogue but this one, and even this one sucks.

March 10, 1996 Sunday 10:57 PM

profound \ adj. [fr. L profundus, fr. pro- before + fundus bottom]
1a: having intellectual depth and insight b: difficult to fathom or understand
2a: extending far below the surface b: coming from, reaching to or situated at a depth : deep seated 3a: characterized by intensity of feeling or quality b: all encompassing : complete syn see deep ANT shallow

March 12, 1996 Tuesday 8:41 PM

(((((Every time the wind blew they would go to the bathroom.)))))

March 15, 1996 Friday 5:45 PM

Evolution is revolution.

March 15, 1996 Friday 6:19 PM

"Audacity makes the star." Todd to Elizabeth Taylor.

(((((Audacity makes the star)))))

March 15, 1996 Friday 8:39 PM

I've never lasted where the joy didn't.

March 16, 1996 Saturday 10:13 PM

The old man in the strip club who says, once gunfire breaks out-- "Check please!"

March 16, 1996 Saturday 11:52 PM

"True love is the ultimate fantasy." (from some movie.) Yes it is because life makes losers of us all.

March 17, 1996 Sunday 8:22 AM

You have to affect the patter in the mind.

To do that you have to go through the body.

The Method is about learning in engage in the ideal posture whether at rest or in effort. (making an effort)

March 17, 1996 Sunday 8:26 AM

My view of the Method, (pressures rise) is about happiness and being more happy because you become more present.

March 17, 1996 Sunday 8:28 AM

We forget our assumptions.

March 17, 1996 Sunday 8:29 AM

There's a point in doing the Method, to where you want to get. You want to get fused with the present. You want to call your mind back from abstraction and deal with being more present. So in many ways it is taking a twist on the coil of our being, how we be, how we be in our body. We like to think that we each are connected to the divine, regardless of our mortality.

March 17, 1996 Sunday 8:35 AM

Rotation stabilizes movement. Remember to breathe. Do it for joy.

March 19, 1996 Tuesday 9:37 PM

"There has to be something to this in order to do that." JG about the Method.

March 24, 1996 Sunday 7:24 PM

"Elegant solutions to problems." SG

April 1, 1996 Monday 7:28 AM

I know I go through a lot of expression with a lot of people that may never receive what I write here.

April 1, 1996 Monday 7:47 AM

The question in the Method is: how do we create decompression and elongation in our posture? How do we stretch into a gravity field to reduce stress?

April 1, 1996 Monday 9:19 AM

I don't need the word "Pilates" to teach what I know.

April 2, 1996 Tuesday 7:57 AM

What makes you think? What makes you think I could do anything else? Especially after so much of my form has already been expressed over so many years?

I do what I do because I must.

April 2, 1996 Tuesday 8:00 AM

You come from the perspective that your mind governs your self. I come from the perspective that your self governs your mind. Your mind, in turn, governs the body.

((((Metaphysical interpretation of one's existence seems necessary to exist. So to evolve in will and consciousness takes the cause of will and consciousness--gravity. Gravity causes rotation. Take away gravity and you get no rotation. Take away rotation and how can there be will or consciousness?))))

April 2, 1996 Tuesday 8:04 AM

The Method is kata, without the veneer of combat. Instead the veneer is physics. (acknowledging what we don't know by idealizing movement.)

hummm. "Idealizing movement", interesting pair of words.

Elegant solutions to ideal situations.

April 2, 1996 Tuesday 9:49 PM

The presence in the moment, knowing the moment will end.

April 7, 1996 Sunday 10:04 AM

THE EIGHTH ELEGY of Rilke

 

 

With all its eyes the natural world looks out

into the Open. Only *our* eyes are turned

backward, and surround plant, animal, child

like traps, as they emerge into their freedom.

We know what is really out there only from

the animal's gaze; for we take the very young

child and force it around, so that it sees

objects--not the Open, which is so

deep in animals' faces. Free from death.

We, only, can see death; the free animal

has its decline in back of it, forever,

and God in front, and when it moves, it moves

already in eternity, like a fountain.

Never, not for a single day, do *we* have

before us that pure space into which flowers

endlessly open. Always there is World

and never Nowhere without the No: that pure

unseparated element which one breathes

without desire and endlessly *knows*. A child

may wonder there for hours, through the timeless

stillness, may get lost in it and be

shaken back. Or someone dies and *is* it.

For, nearing death, one doesn't see death; but stares

beyond, perhaps with an animal's vast gaze.

Lovers, if the beloved were not there

blocking the view, are close to it, and marvel . . .

As if by some mistake, it opens for them

behind each other . . . But neither can move past

Forever turned toward objects, we see in them

the mere reflection of the realm of freedom,

which we have dimmed. Or when some animal

mutely, serenely, looks us through and through.

That is what fate means: to be opposite,

to be opposite and nothing else, forever.

 

If the animal moving toward us so securely

in a different direction had our kind of

consciousness--, it would wrench us around and drag us

along its path. But it feels its life as boundless,

unfathomable, and without regard

to its own condition: pure, like its outward gaze.

And where we see the future, it sees all time

and itself within all time, forever healed.

 

Yet in the alert, warm animal there lies

the pain and burden of an enormous sadness.

For it too feels the presence of what often

overwhelms us: a memory, as if

the element we keep pressing toward was once

more intimate, more true, and our communion

infinitely tender. Here all is distance;

there it was breath. After that first home,

the second seems ambiguous and drafty.

Oh bliss of the *tiny* creature which remains

forever inside the womb that was its shelter;

joy of the gnat which, still *within*, leaps up

even at is marriage: for everything is womb.

And look at the half-assurance of the bird,

which knows both inner and outer, from its source,

as if it were the soul of an Etruscan,

flown out of a dead man received inside a space,

but with his reclining image as the lid.

And how bewildered is any womb-born creature

that has to fly. As if terrified and fleeing

from itself, it zigzags through the air, the way

a crack runs through a teacup. So the bat

quivers across the porcelain of evening.

 

And we: spectators, always, everywhere,

turned toward the world of objects, never outward.

It fills us. We arrange it. It breaks down.

We rearrange it, then break down ourselves.

 

Who has twisted us around like this, so that

no matter what we do, we are in the posture

of someone going away? Just as, upon

the farthest hill, which shows him his whole valley

one last time, he turns, stops, lingers--,

so we live here, forever taking leave.

 

April 10, 1996 Wednesday 8:42 PM

Mountains are the high country of the mind. Lofty, difficult to access, immutable, the thin clean air, opens your mind to be more, feel more, see more, smell more, touch more-- of your self, your world, your inner awareness of the brief moment you spend in time.

The trees are survivors. Gnarled, wind torn, with deep roots that suck what little water remains after the runoff. They smell like city folk's closets only better. They only break the rain if they are very tall and very thick. I'm speaking of course of the evergreens. The aspens are a different matter.

A grove of aspens is a garden of gods. Tall round reaching trunks on their way to heaven, tallest ones in the center, the further out from the center the younger and shorter the children. Riding horseback through a mature grove of aspens is one of the most sacred, exhilarating, spine-straightening experiences I'm ever lucky enough to be a part of. Long ago I'd climb an aspen of just the right adolescent age and go high enough to sway in the wind. When the wind goes through a grove of aspens the fluttering color change from light green to dark makes a sea of waves that betrays where and when the wind is and isn't. One of the best places to fall away into slumber. Have a picnic. Make love. Read poetry. Do nothing but be.

The best waterfalls are the little ones. Spring run off, through lush green moss, makes faint gurgling sounds that speak of timeless arrivals of spring. A brief stanza of an infinite song. Cool to touch, crystal clear to the bottom of any pool, and for the adventurer an eye-popping swim of refreshment. Generally, best for soaking the feet after a long hike in tight shoes.

Love is hope that somehow there is more to what only is. Freedom is only the choice to choose an attitude--hope or fear. There is no stasis, only regression or progression.

I once believed love transcended all, that love knew no limits, especially time. I once believed that I could be loved like I felt I could love. Instead love has been convenience, self-aggrandizement, and my failure to settle for less a history of failure to accept no more.

I have come to my just rewards, cynicism, once called the intellectual's depression. How do I feed my hunger when I do not believe there to be food?

Priest or parent neither am I. A vagabond, fool, philanderer, tool. I feel will move through me, insist on having its way. What of me? What of thee? What parts do we play? To follow your heart is to surrender indeed. But what leap of faith can this be for one who walked away from a catholic leap of faith so long ago?

I write to lance the boil.

Yes, May is forever away and the heat of our passion will have long since had its way. The realities of our baggage, the risks of our intimacies, will come to light, and all in electrons, before we ever get to play. No eye to eye looks, no chemical cloud interplay, no breathless touch. No smells at the nape of your neck. So here we are safely masturbating in the cocoon of distance.

I know your hunger, and less I am for you than man or boy, at best a friend nodding to you along the way.

I want a mailing address. For the day when harsh realities give way. ((And I know all this weak rhyming is distracting, yucky, primitive...don't care. Don't stare. I'm lonely tonight and have no one to talk to.))

April 15, 1996 Monday 1:28 PM

We are all confused. We all interpret what cannot be understood. Religion, philosophy, science, occult, they all seek pattern to promote survival.

April 21, 1996 Sunday 11:13 PM

The Method draws from deep roots.

April 21, 1996 Sunday 11:14 PM

The Method works within a physical world, that develops at its purest level, ability to move. Old or young, sick or healthy, you come away more present. Beyond mind and body, you come away being more. In the world and much more present. Much more in the moment, movement puts you in the moment.

MOVEMENT PUTS YOU IN THE MOMENT mjm

April 21, 1996 Sunday 11:33 PM

You seek to gain more control over your body through concentration directed at using your breathing to initiate and enhance movement.

April 21, 1996 Sunday 11:43 PM

You see, the point is, to keeping a log in this manner, to address it as it comes out and you group it later.

April 21, 1996 Sunday 11:58 PM

Teaching the Method requires undivided attention. And that is what you are trying to teach--undivided attention.

April 22, 1996 Monday 9:11 AM

The point of the Method is not to think but to be. So you must leave your mind behind. You must stop thinking and concentrate on doing. Doesn't that seem odd, that thinking is somehow different than concentrating? Why is this? Dunno. Maybe concentrating has something more to do with directing your awareness and not just your mind. Maybe it points out the difference between thinking and being. I might feel better about the Mind/Body connection if it were Awareness/Body instead.

Or, as in the case with one well-chosen studio name: The Conscious Body.

May 1, 1996 Wednesday 11:26 PM

The listener imagines what he hears.

May 2, 1996 Thursday 2:29 AM

It's not who gets to compete; it's who gets to watch.

May 2, 1996 Thursday 7:48 PM

(((You must remember the leapfrog effect of technology. And there are always those jumping over you, with the latest purchase that you can only hope to counter by having made strategic moves when you made them.)))

May 4, 1996 Saturday 3:36 PM

You can't put a price on prestige. Augusta

May 4, 1996 Saturday 3:36 PM

Power is nothing without control. Pirelli Tires

May 4, 1996 Saturday 3:37 PM

Always and in all ways.

May 4, 1996 Saturday 3:37 PM

Awareness is a focal nexus.

May 5, 1996 Sunday 9:49 AM

(((Losing the need to write. What must that feel like?)))

for someone who exists so clearly in their own mind to be so obfuscated in others

May 5, 1996 Sunday 9:58 AM

(((((It's about Michael Miller. It's not about the Method.)))))

May 6, 1996 Monday 7:47 AM

The Method makes progression from the center out into space.

May 12, 1996 Sunday 8:41 AM

I like to afford others the same privacy I'm seeking. mjm

You see, we have to go out and extend our selves to others to make a living so we can withdraw from others to enjoy what we made.

May 15, 1996 Wednesday 8:48 AM

Why am I here? What is it that I am trying to share with others?

It is the participation in the idealization.

May 23, 1996 Thursday 8:22 AM

My problem with life has always been my incredulity at what a woman can live with.

May 23, 1996 Thursday 8:25 AM

No one will ever take the place of May-May.

May 26, 1996 Sunday 11:57 AM

To Sherri, "Do it while you can."

May 26, 1996 Sunday 8:34 PM

((((((We're not watchin' a movie and this is as real as it gets.))))))

May 28, 1996 Tuesday 8:13 PM

Somehow you have to settle for reality being your dream. mjm

June 3, 1996 Monday 8:54 AM

So, I broke my back pressing the limits of control.

June 13, 1996 Thursday 8:14 AM

There are some people who only know how to lean towards you and cannot be leaned towards.

June 13, 1996 Thursday 8:22 AM

It is not my body that is attracted to the Method. It is my mind, the connection to the imagined world we live in

June 13, 1996 Thursday 8:27 AM

It's no different than when I was in fifth grade, still too provocatively precocious.

June 13, 1996 Thursday 8:29 AM

We try to involute because over time life evolutes. When we involute we last longer. We don't uncoil.

June 13, 1996 Thursday 8:30 AM

You control your attitude, where you are in space.

June 13, 1996 Thursday 5:21 PM

What people do with the Method:

Get back to normal.

Maintain normal.

Surpass normal.

June 14, 1996 Friday 7:03 PM

The standard is out of the bag. Now it doesn't matter what you call it, once the Method is understood what exercises done in what order is plain to see.

June 16, 1996 Sunday 8:32 AM

When you take a position you must stay the course.

June 16, 1996 Sunday 8:48 AM

And there it is again, emerging patterns and their power.

To recognize that we are patterned energy.

We participate in patterns though our concentration, by controlling what we do at the most core level of our being, our breath. When we choose to move within our breath the purposes for why we move and why we breathe become one. We become more present. And the more in the present you can be the more you experience joy. (even in the midst of pain)

((That's the duality of life isn't it, one edge of the sword pain, the other pleasure))

June 16, 1996 Sunday 8:59 AM

I wonder if spirits to come will laugh at our insistence to experience pain?

June 16, 1996 Sunday 9:01 AM

Do you profess what you got from somebody else or do you come from a place you choose? And is that choice of the head or heart, and is there any other place to come from?

June 16, 1996 Sunday 9:04 AM

So, by slowing down enough to have it expressed my way, I lost my way.

June 21, 1996 Friday 8:03 AM

It's the whirlwind of isolation that sends us yearning for an outlet outside ourselves. Only when pressure and lack of options combine are we forced to connect to the duality within.

June 21, 1996 Friday 8:13 AM

I have to smile when I remember whom I am, someone who has written all my life as a way to cope with a world all too out of control.

Breathing, transitions, discretion.

June 21, 1996 Friday 8:18 AM

Wanting beats having.

June 23, 1996 Sunday 10:58 AM

I haven't felt this alone in a long time. Unsure of what to do with my self; unsure of who my self wants to be.

June 26, 1996 Wednesday 12:24 AM

It doesn't matter what you call it. I'll call it my view if I can't give credit where it's due. Step out and say it for yourself in your own way.

June 28, 1996 Friday 6:21 PM

I think it is appropriate to have a competition in the Method because the Method is an ideal that is recognizable and judgable. People who don't understand the idea or who don't teach the ideal even though they call it by the ideal name are not about to surrender whatever power they have assumed under that name.

June 28, 1996 Friday 6:24 PM

This resource will be invaluable for anyone wanting an in depth look at the quality and quantity of the classic Method. The only training on the tape is my view of the Method. The rest is the Method done in flow, with the breath being the only audio instruction.

July 20, 1996 Saturday 10:11 AM

In the Method you seek control through concentrating on coming from the center with precise flowing movement that follows the breath.

July 23, 1996 Tuesday 11:29 PM

You melt me with your attention.

July 26, 1996 Friday 6:51 PM

So much stuff pushes aside the journal. Pity, really.

July 26, 1996 Friday 6:52 PM

I'm too close to what I'm doing. When you teach to a specific client you are limited to what they need to hear. When you speak to here, the journal, to what you most have to say to someone who wanted to hear the most of your message.

When you do the Method, the only thing that matters is engaging in the moment. To get healthy is secondary, to find balance ulterior.

When doing the Method you indulge in the moment to prepare for the next.

July 30, 1996 Tuesday 9:15 PM

Look at Olympic diving as an example of controlling angular momentum. As soon as you control rolling like a ball you begin the journey.

July 30, 1996 Tuesday 9:18 PM

Tension affects stress.

August 3, 1996 Saturday 6:47 PM

Concentration buys control.

August 5, 1996 Monday 9:12 AM

How vain to seek to maintain a connection. Isn't that what life is all about?

August 5, 1996 Monday 9:47 AM

In rowings, be frog legs; swoop arms as in the landing of the long jump in breath and then take it to the sand.

August 5, 1996 Monday 9:48 AM

The log entry process really is the lay of the land once you get to know the territory. (smile)

August 6, 1996 Tuesday 7:50 AM

The journal is some place you come to when you need to talk and have no one around. Once you get to talking to yourself, more accurately--listening to your self, everything is better.

August 9, 1996 Friday 1:37 PM

I see so much of other-than the Method. The Method is being.

August 12, 1996 Monday 10:17 AM

Self-image is 99.9% hallucination.

August 16, 1996 Friday 9:27 PM

Layers and depths. Here beneath my fingers, behind my mind. So what is it here, beneath my fingers? Who is it other than the I AM WHO AM thing? And once you understand that then where doest thou go next?

August 16, 1996 Friday 9:32 PM

About to send a major burst into the ether. Mixed feelings about that one.

August 16, 1996 Friday 9:34 PM

Understand the flow of electrons and you see the flow of life. The structure of life is that what precedes influences what follows, i.e. being at the end of a datestamp style tag and hitting enter only to come to a log entry style tag because you have the setting of what follows what pre-arranged.

August 16, 1996 Friday 9:36 PM

It is tough to not take even a cynical view of making log entries. The echoes of the past are always the most enticing. ((((( )))))

Space--what goes between the ideas, like string between the beads,

August 16, 1996 Friday 9:40 PM

Money buys privilege. mjm

August 27, 1996 Tuesday 5:16 PM

There is something about looking at the eyes of a loved one who in your presence looks out into the world. What they see, that they see, makes your life significant, meaningful.

August 29, 1996 Thursday 8:09 PM

Politics

Because this is America, to teach the Method and call it Pilates, is a right that someone will sell you.

To learn to teach the Method will be determined by what you are will to settle for. The learning process is ongoing and comes from many sources.

I assure you there is a clarity and a define-ability in the Method. It is not this; it is not that; it is what it is and once you understand what gives the Method its unique character you will not confuse or blend or base what you teach as though it is the Method.

Who you learn from is more a matter of opportunity and affordability, than authority. Around the world there are gifted, experienced, teachers of the Method. Seek and you will find. In my bias, no one understands the Method better than I do, but I don't speak to everyone. And there is no better place to have access to the largest density of talented instructors geared to helping you learn the Method than in Boulder. You compare and you'll see.

So I guess I'm saying to use the name go to New York, to learn the game, go to Boulder. Come talk to me, I'll share with you my view.

September 6, 1996 Friday 7:41 AM

I keep the faith that somehow following my passion will eventually pay my bills.

September 6, 1996 Friday 7:45 AM

Breathing is the doorway into the Method. Only by focusing your concentration on your breathing can you insure that your breathing is leading any other effort of movement.

September 7, 1996 Saturday 4:42 PM

You never deny consequence, it denies history.

September 7, 1996 Saturday 4:44 PM

When you try to see "out there" concentrate on your breath. For even your breath is out there, beyond, other than, out side of your awareness. Whatever awareness is, is in here; everything else is out there--your breath, your movement--everything. Awareness wants more being. When you focus on your breath, you draw your self into bigger, better--being. Bigger, better--being.

September 7, 1996 Saturday 11:36 PM

Grace

I hold my life in fingers too thick.

like fabric from some celestial thought
caught in a weave of nothing the mind could understand.

Life is sold
into hands that cannot conceive
of what they hold.

To these hands
and to the dumb brute of sleeping man
come such gifts of grace

gifts for which kings
would sell their souls
if they but knew such gifts were bestowed at all

to peasant and king the same,
life is captured mystery
is so sweet a cage, these veins.

---Stephanie Selene Anderson

September 8, 1996 Sunday 8:28 PM

Younger lovers never have been around long enough to matter, long enough to make you feel not alone. You end up with only your self to hang out with because your self is the only one who knows you well enough to offer any companionship.

September 12, 1996 Thursday 10:25 AM

Always that chemical shade, puts on the edge of projection. As though, while I hear it I must capture it. Not so much to share it, that comes later, but to grab hold of what I hear so that I might remember it later.

September 12, 1996 Thursday 10:27 AM

What does it mean when someone loves you? What responsibility does that place on you?

September 12, 1996 Thursday 10:33 AM

(((You know it is not that I like to see my words in print. I like capturing them better. Showing the result of the cast net is only part of the process.))) Thank god for the Internet, now I'm "out there" ((((in more ways than one))) and can turn to other matters.

September 12, 1996 Thursday 10:42 AM

GO ONLINE WITH YOUR SELF mjm

September 12, 1996 Thursday 10:43 AM

You don't need a computer and a phone line to plug in. Paper and pencil only can help, but you, you must choose to listen.

September 18, 1996 Wednesday 8:29 PM

How can we be in the world, and become attached? How can we enjoy the world and not betray our joy?

September 22, 1996 Sunday 2:16 PM

You learn so much about how to teach the Method to someone who doesn't know it. What of teaching someone who knows it well?

September 22, 1996 Sunday 5:25 PM

You worry about the wake when you don't know where you're going. mjm

September 23, 1996 Monday 9:19 AM

I'll use whatever image I can that works. I use physics as my image. Is that so bad?

September 23, 1996 Monday 9:22 AM

Concentration is not a slow thing.

September 23, 1996 Monday 9:36 AM

"Hey, they're practicing attorneys, and I'm helpin' them practice."

September 23, 1996 Monday 9:38 AM

The message is simple. Control. How you find it is the Method. You concentrate on your breathing to drive you through your body.

September 23, 1996 Monday 9:50 AM

There's more to life than being in your body.

September 23, 1996 Monday 10:00 AM

(((((Sometimes you sacrifice the ideal for the effect.))))

September 23, 1996 Monday 10:03 AM

((((We exist together within the ether.))))

September 23, 1996 Monday 10:06 AM

Marketing is what you're gunna do, sales is what you do.

September 26, 1996 Thursday 9:05 AM

"Pain is resistance." Ida Rolph

September 26, 1996 Thursday 10:04 AM

you leave me without arms
speechless
still.

Caught in my isolation
no way in
no way out
no way of not knowing.

Caught
and pierced by the awareness

There was no lie
in my asking for you
just something you asked me
I couldn't do.

Here I am, at the keys, staring at the keys, listening.

Just because we each individually feel the same box, doesn't mean that it is any easier to accept the way the box makes you feel.

September 26, 1996 Thursday 10:16 AM

People pull attitude.

September 26, 1996 Thursday 10:37 AM

Tension controls movement.

September 28, 1996 Saturday 10:36 AM

Always there are thoughts that want to crowd in. You mustn't let them. Hold fast, wait to hear.
(((((wait to hear)))))

In the Method, you exhale so completely you end up waiting for the initiation of your inhale like you stand there waiting for a bus. When it comes, it slides in smoothly, wisks you up, and carries you away.

September 30, 1996 Monday 7:43 PM

The View of Cornu is about tensions in balance. Intentionally. In-tension, intention-ally, there--in purpose, in the intention, is the Method.

I don't know what I have to contribute to all this, if there even is a this. But I feel it, the surge to contribute, the sense of making contribution. Tuned into my self. And oh, so loving it.

September 30, 1996 Monday 7:53 PM

The Method, the Method, the Method, what I beg from you? The Method. Why? That is because what my self begs of me.

October 2, 1996 Wednesday 11:19 AM

Once the blush wears off, it's over.

October 5, 1996 Saturday 4:49 PM

THEY ARE RELOADING RIGHT NOW!
THEY ARE RELOADING RIGHT NOW!
Under Siege

October 5, 1996 Saturday 5:24 PM

Money clarifies control. mjm to jerry

October 6, 1996 Sunday 2:28 PM

When you get your circulation going
the whole world goes with you. mjm (said before?) ((by me, of course.))

October 11, 1996 Friday 4:34 PM

The hook is "I love you" from her,
the line and sinker is "I love you, too" from him.

October 12, 1996 Saturday 11:03 AM

Nobody cares about your will as much as you do, so the lesson to be learned is that if you want it done you better get it that way before you can't anymore.

October 12, 1996 Saturday 7:49 PM

Sequence cleanses.

The Latin Mass, The Method workout.

October 12, 1996 Saturday 7:51 PM

Hey, if I ask you for your money for anything other than this, I would be cheating you. This is the only thing I have to sell, me, here, this moment. And any tracks that I can leave you are welcome to.

October 12, 1996 Saturday 7:54 PM

(((That moment of bliss leaves you lost in your own thought.)))

October 20, 1996 Sunday 12:56 PM

What would I say? Where would I say it? How do I capture such feelings in the sequence of words? Is this indeed the Hound of Heaven?

I was so sure of my self. That it was there. That it sought me to express it. And that I, through all this time, had been seeking to do just that. Express my self.

October 20, 1996 Sunday 1:00 PM

Is the end of one relationship different than the end of any other? Do we find our selves naked and alone whenever truth knocks on our door?

October 21, 1996 Monday 9:05 AM

Isn't that what we are all trying to do--carve our mark? Leave something behind? Why? What for? Why bother? Maybe this thing called life is only the brush of a shoulder as we move along our way.

October 31, 1996 Thursday 8:19 AM

To get there, you have to listen to what you are thinking and let that be part of what you do.

November 5, 1996 Tuesday 8:28 AM

Rotation. Rotation, rotation, rotation. Rotation is the sequence that defines a group.

Concentration is rotation. We are on a "time line" so the only way we can stay focused on anything is to revolve around it.

Rotate to Concentrate.

November 6, 1996 Wednesday 3:05 PM

So, one minute completely by my self with no conversation, the next complete connection. Why so? Why so?

November 6, 1996 Wednesday 3:09 PM

And then you come passing through me. Like Ghost, but we're both real. And being near you vibrates me.

Vibration. Now we're talkin'.

(((((Whew, baby!)))))

This relationship within.

The vibration, that's what we miss. We get near a vibration and we resonate. Once started, we want more.

November 10, 1996 Sunday 10:21 AM

(((((I have no self-esteem. Why is that?)))))

Yes, indeed, why is that?

November 10, 1996 Sunday 10:24 AM

And what is it that always makes our future so uncertain? Predictable, but uncertain.

November 10, 1996 Sunday 10:36 AM

When you can taste the difference between the colors of M&M's you have arrived. (Arrived where? (Exactly!))

That's a great example of the way I use parens.

November 10, 1996 Sunday 11:28 AM

(((((Just keep feeding your art, Mike.)))))

November 16, 1996 Saturday 11:53 AM

If you can't get lost in the thought of it you really can't get off in the doing of it.

November 22, 1996 Friday 9:09 AM

Not everyone can appreciate what doing the Method offers. Still, it can be beneficial to many.

November 22, 1996 Friday 9:10 AM

Knocking around looking for words...like looking in the closet of an abandoned house.

November 22, 1996 Friday 9:10 AM

What to do next, what to do next, what to do next,...

November 22, 1996 Friday 9:15 AM

Any training program has to develop from within, especially the Method because it is rooted in eccentricity out from the center. Certification is not to be sought from outside, but from within. Just like a "soul surfer" merges with the wave, doing the Method merges you with the process. Our aliveness is locked into the process of time. The more we are part of the process the more alive we are, the more present. By concentrating on the flow of our breathing we connect to the flow of life through time. When we increase control of our body we increase our being.

November 22, 1996 Friday 10:10 AM

(((When you pull your own leash what good does it do you?)))

November 22, 1996 Friday 10:16 AM

Consciousness transcends will.

November 22, 1996 Friday 10:16 AM

Consciousness transcends will when you become aware of will moving through you. There the separation begins. What you do, once you become aware, is the choice that defines your character.

November 24, 1996 Sunday 9:39 AM

It is the loneliness factor. That is why religions develop ritual. To embrace in a pattern to support the moment.

November 24, 1996 Sunday 9:42 AM

I'm so far inside I can't look out.

November 24, 1996 Sunday 9:42 AM

We make music. We get from here to there. ((The girl walking along the beach from that poem.))

November 26, 1996 Tuesday 11:42 AM

There is no hope. That's why choosing hope saves you.

November 26, 1996 Tuesday 11:43 AM

((((Are we drawn or propelled?))))

November 30, 1996 Saturday 9:44 AM

You create baggage when you create memories.

December 1, 1996 Sunday 9:23 AM

(((((Don't worry. Be calm. You'll get it done. Breathe.)))))

December 1, 1996 Sunday 9:26 AM

(((((Communion)))))

December 2, 1996 Monday 9:04 AM

So, here I go.


MICHAELMILLER@HERMIT.COM